Introductions

I am Slacker the Hacker and we are here to talk about golf as the journey. I don’t know exactly what that means but, they say I have to get off the couch and do something so here we are. Know this now before we start that many stories will follow and most are embellished, exaggerated, fictionalized, or otherwise completely lacking any basis in reality whatsoever, oh and all the names have been changed in order to blackmail the innocent later. When I’m not doing nothing I like to be out golfing, whether hitting balls, playing, or side betting on TV pros, I just love the lifestyle. My caddy’s name is Hackenstein, again not his real name but because he limps, gimps, and is best kept separate from the general population. Hackenstein is a genius when it comes to making it to the first tee on time with bloodies in the cart. As a caddy the best thing I can say is he drives the van, this is huge for me because my meds often leave me not wanting to operate heavy machinery and I like to take naps. He can read greens, too. He read some breakers down in Alabama once that paid rent for the whole winter and left us with a little bar money too. He doesn’t need much and he’s easy to feed and keeps himself entertained for the most part, and he’s dead helpful when it comes to managing the course, with luck he’ll throw some tips your way along the journey. Gotta get for now, teeing early tomorrow, don’t ask me why, we’re hooked up through a friend of a friend of a friend on some private club deal, sounded like easy bank at the time but now it just feels early. I hear they do have good greens, nice and fast with lots of undulation, having a quality pair of eyes like Hacks is going to help a lot plus he’s my partner and he’s getting 9 strokes, I think the dude must want to do business or something, maybe I’ll let you know how it goes later, in the meantime hit ‘em hard and shout if you need me.